Social Connection
Written by therapist, Lana Katz. Learn about Lana’s work at https://www.lanakatz.com.
We've all heard that relationships matter, but most people underestimate how profoundly social connection shapes wellbeing.
Wellbeing is, in part, relational.
From infancy, we learn to regulate through caregivers who soothe, respond to, and reflect our emotions. As adults, we continue to function best in the presence of safe, supportive relationships. While social connection helps regulate our nervous system, its impact extends much further.
Relationships shape our identity.
We come to understand who we are through the people who listen to us, respond to us, acknowledge us, and make space for our internal world. When these interactions are consistent and accepting, they reinforce a stable sense of self. When they are critical, dismissive, or absent, self-doubt can begin to take hold, not only about our abilities, but also about our value. This process doesn't end in childhood. Our sense of self continues to be influenced by the relationships and environments we experience throughout life.
A central part of a healthy sense of self is the belief that we matter.
Mattering is the feeling that our presence has value, that we are seen, appreciated, and that our contributions make a difference. It develops through everyday interactions, asking genuine questions, remembering personal details, valuing someone's perspective, recognizing their contributions, and helping them feel included.
This has important implications for the workplace.
Research consistently shows that employee wellbeing is driven as much by the quality of relationships as by organizational policies. According to the Indeed Global Work Wellbeing Report (2024), only one in five employees are thriving, and among the strongest predictors of wellbeing are social factors such as belonging and inclusion, not simply compensation or flexibility.
In practice, fostering mattering doesn't require grand gestures. It looks like protecting one-on-one meetings, sharing information from leadership discussions, inviting people into meaningful conversations and opportunities, delegating work that communicates trust, recognizing contributions both privately and publicly, seeking feedback during periods of change, explaining decisions when input cannot be incorporated, connecting everyday work to a larger purpose, checking in when someone seems different, and repairing relationships when mistakes occur.
These seemingly small behaviors send a powerful message: You matter here.
That message influences far more than morale. Employees increasingly value meaningful workplace relationships, and having a close friend at work remains one of the strongest predictors of engagement and wellbeing (Gallup; Patel & Plowman, 2022). We seek these connections because they foster psychological safety, reduce isolation, and strengthen our sense of belonging.
Whether at home or at work, people thrive when they feel they matter. In our personal lives, that sense of mattering deepens trust and emotional security. In organizations, it strengthens engagement, loyalty, collaboration, and retention. When people know they matter, both they and the organizations they contribute to are more likely to flourish.
Here are several key studies and research findings on social connection and well-being:
Patel, A., & Plowman, S. “The Increasing Importance of a Best Friend at Work.” Gallup, 2024.
Harvard Study of Adult Development. “Adult Development Study.” https://www.adultdevelopmentstudy.org/